Sorry if this comes out like a big blurt. But im so upset.

SIL who takes way too much valium and pain killers and doesnt do much with her son is pregnant. This is just what I need while on the dreaded HRT. I hate this shit. I hate my body. I hate fertile people. I hate me. Last time we stayed with them while doing a cycle she was going on about how she is probably infertile cause they had been trying for while. blah lbah blah... Im so upset and Jay isnt home. I have no one to talk to and I just want to cry.

The HRT itsself is making me feel shocking. I feel sooo god damn sick, I just want to curl up and die. Hollie isnt sleeping, and im so tired......

I hate this post, didnt want this blog to be all negative shit. :-(

Signing off

My Blogging virignity is finally broken. The urge to start one I have resisted until this minute, so here I am...

Easter has been and gone, and to say im soooo over easter eggs is an understatement. I didnt actually eat that many but Hollie did and that is a disaster waiting to happen..

My little cherub turned 2 on saturday. HOw did that happen? One minute she is an embryo in a dish and the next minute she is 2 years old. She had a lovely day with a few family members and a couple of freinds over for a sausage sizzle. I did the " good creative mummy" thing and made her a Dorothy cake. Wasnt quite the image i had in my mind but everyone thought it was great. I used a freinds Dorothy toy as the model.

I had a wedding on Easter sunday which was just a small one with the bride and groom both being married before. She only wanted a couple of rolls taken, so that was a nice easy job.

Af arrived on Hols B'day, which meant the start of a new IVF cycle. I would have started the HRT that day but since it was a holiday weekend there is no pathology available for base line bloods to be done. So tommorrow I go down for bloods and then start the HRT. Im quietly freaking out again about the moody monster I turn into when I start taking these drugs. I just cant control it.